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Final Essay - Kontrol Eder misiniz?

Çok basit bir essay ama azıcık uzun. Gramer açısından hata olmaması çok önemli. Kontrol ederseniz çok sevinirim.


There are so many singers nowadays with different singing and dancing styles, characteristics, and attractions. In my opinion, regardless of talent, if a singer buys some lyrics, pays someone to add some rhythm, and getting on stage with these soulless work, that does not make him/her a good singer. Uniqueness and real effort, while adding something from your own are essentials of being a good, or even a legend singer. This is what I like about Michael Jackson and also why I think he is one of the most talented singers ever. He has his own lyrics and style of singing, dancing, dressing and so on. Therefore, it is not hard to say that everything about him is very recognizable. I think his talent in songs, unique style and live performances are what makes him a legend and the most talented singer ever.

The uniqueness in his songs is one of the things that made him one of the most talented singer and a true legend. A song has three layers; songwriting, singing, and performing. Michael Jackson had done very significant work in all these three layers. First of all, most of his songs are written by him, not any other person. Beat It, Bad, Billie Jean, Black or White, The Way You Make Me Feel are just a few examples of those songs. Since most of his songs are written by him, we can say that there is true emotion there and his songs are actually a part of him. Otherwise it’s hard to get the feeling for both him and us because I don’t really see such songs as heartfelt ones. For example, I used to like the song Man in the Mirror a lot, but then I found out someone else wrote the song, not Michael Jackson. I suddenly lost my interest to the song. I didn’t do this on purpose, but the connection between me and the song was lost at that time. When I listen to Michael Jackson, I want to hear what he has to say and what he feels, I’m not interested in someone else’s story. Besides, he tells a story from his own in most his songs. I think this is very important to see if the performer is heartfelt or not. For instance, Billie Jean has a very interesting story. Michael Jackson stated several times that “Billie Jean” was based on the groupies he and his brothers had relationship with back in 1980s. He said that there was a lot of Billie Jeans out there and every girl claimed that their son was related to one of his brothers. I think it’s so special to hear world’s one of the most known songs with such story from such a legend performer. That does not happen all the time. In singing perspective; his voice and rhythms are so identifiable that when you hear his song, you probably recognize him. His yelling as “hee-heee” is at very high pitch and so unique that only he could do it. Even nowadays, it would be very silly to hear this from another performer. It just would not make sense. Moreover, it is technically proven that he had incredibly wide range of octave diapason in addition to being able to reflect any emotional nuance in his songs. Besides those unique high pitched yelling and wide range of octave diapason, he had such songs that only he can sing. His singing tone and style in general is so special that there is not many singers that dares to sing Billie Jean, Leave Me Alone, I Just Can’t Stop Loving You, Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’ and so forth.

His style in general is very unique too. For example there is a “Michael Jackson’s hat.” When I see a black fedora hat with its brim goes all the way around, he comes up to my mind, Not Frank Sinatra or Al Capone. There is “Michael Jackson’s glove” which is white, for only one hand with silver sequins on the back. His black and slim tie, black leather jacket, white socks with black shoes is such a popular combination all around the world. There is “Michael Jackson dance” which has very sudden and sharp moves as there is no gravity. Also his body when he danced was like with no mass or muscles. I don’t know specific name for each move, but, of course his signature Moonwalk is one of the most known move in his unique dance and a good example of those sharp and unusual moves. Furthermore, people from all around the world are trying to be successful in talent contests by trying to do “Michael Jackson dance” with all his clothes, glove, hat and so on. It is not some kind of dance; it is belong to only one person. I think this is more than enough to consider him one of the most talented performers ever.

Michael Jackson is considered as one of the best live performer ever. I think he is the best live performer in terms of very unique choreography, being prepared, and having endless energy. His style did not let him take a stage while he is drunk. It is all or nothing; he had such a style that it is impossible to give a concert without an advanced preparation. His choreography was not jumping up and down and running around. He had to know his timing because his moves were very connected with the rhythm. For example when the rhythm goes “bum-bum-bum” he had to jump in each “bum.” Also he had to know what he was going to do in group dancing in order to be synchronized. Without sync, group dancing would not have any point. It takes a lot of effort to sing and dance in such a unique way for two hours in front of a hundred thousand people. In addition, I like the fact that his dancers (whom ages are between twenty and thirty) were having very hard time while trying to keep up with him even when he was fifty years old. To be more specific, I am talking about his very last performance; This Is It. He was exactly fifty years old, however, he could still dance much better and longer than other young dancers. In fact, in some scenes, it can be seen that the dancers were getting tired and slowing down, but Michael Jackson still dominating the stage. In addition, he is such talented in dancing that they used to make auditions for advanced dancers only in all around the world to qualify people that are able to dance behind him.
In conclusion, I think Michael Jackson is one of the most talented singers ever and a true legend. He tells a story from his own in his songs during both writing lyrics and performing. He is a true heartfelt. In fact, he has one of the most wide-ranged octave diapason ever. Also he is very identifiable in his songs and clothing. He is so original that he has his own dancing and singing style. In addition to all these uniqueness, I think he is the best live performer ever. He could sing and dance for hours even when he was fifty years old. I think these are more than enough characteristics to see him as one of the most talented singers ever. All these values are so hard to see in a singer nowadays; therefore, we should appreciate him for his great contributions to our world and also let his legacy to live forever for other generations.

 
1. parag. 3. satır "getting" değil "gets" olmalı
1. parag. 5. satır "legend" yerine "legendary" daha doğru sanki
2. parag. 2. satır "had done" değil "has done" olmalı
2. parag. 17. satır "In singing perspective" değil "from singing perspective"

ilk iki paragrafta bulabildiklerim bunlar, sıkıldım başkası devam etsin :)
  • bu konu cok sevimsiz  (10.11.12 19:32:02) 
çok fazla i think demişsin. gramatik bi hata olmasa da itici kılıyor /:


  • solo  (10.11.12 19:36:00) 
3 saniye baktım.

michael jackson ile ilgili kısımda

one of the best performer demişsin ama one of the best performers olacak. öptüm.
  • bunlarolmaz  (10.11.12 19:39:22) 
P.1 I think his talent in songs.
bildiğim kadarıyla talent in diye birşey yok. He has got great talent for singing diyerek devam edebilirsiniz.

okuyorum daha editliyeceğim.
  • cileklikusmuk  (10.11.12 19:41:19) 
yapacak daha iyi bi iş bulamadım, devam ediyorum :)

3. parag. 2. satır "goes" yerine "going"
3. parag. 4. satır "... black shoes is such a popular" yerine "... black shoes build up such a popular"
3. parag. 6. satır "Also his body when he danced was like with no mass or muscles" yerine "also his body was as if it had no mass or muscles when he danced" daha iyi.
"It is not some kind of dance; it is belong to only one person." gramer olarak çok çok yanlış, bence bu cümleyi direk at.
  • bu konu cok sevimsiz  (10.11.12 19:46:41) 
editleyemiyormuşum.

2.paragrafın ilk cumlesinde iki kere ard arda one of the dikkat çekiyor ikinci kısmı komple atıp sadece true legend diyebilirsin.

bitti.
  • cileklikusmuk  (10.11.12 19:52:17) 
sadece son paragrafi okudum. cok fazla ever var onlari kesinlikle azalt. sonuc paragrafinda yeni seyler söylemissin hep, cok "conclusion" olmamis. birde "identifiable in his songs and clothing" demisin ama "in" orda dogru degil bence. "by" olabilir mesela "in" icin söyle bir kullanim gerekir --> ".. identifiable in crowd" gibi.

Digerlerinin söyledigi gibi cok fazla I think demisin. Birde gözüme carpti 2. paragrafta made yerine makes daha dpgru bir kullanim olur. su cümlede -->(The uniqueness in his songs is one of the things that made him one of the most talented singer and a true legend.)
  • kimse  (11.11.12 01:15:52) 
1
buraya yazılanların hakları Sir Anthony Hopkins'e aittir.
yazan eden compumaster, ilgilenen eden fader
modere edenler angelus, Artibir, aychovsky, baba jo, basond, compumaster, deckard, duyulmasi gerektigi kadar, fader, fraise, groove salad, kahvegibi, kaymaktutmayansicaksut, kibritsuyu, monstro, pandispanya, robin, ron dennis
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